Being grateful for what you have (reposted from personal wall, felt like sharing here)

This is the handwriting of a 32 year old woman. My sister to precise, and mentally she is somewhere between 4 and 10 years old

Why am I sharing this?

Am I trying to get some sympathy for her or my situation?

Am I balls?

You see I was going though my post (I still have some of delivered to my old home address – lazy little sod I know) and totally missed this card from my sister

She likes to write me notes – and all she wants from life is to spend time with me, go to her club/disco and buy clothes

Like having a permanent little sister

There are many opportunities in life that quite frankly she simple won’t have

[Side note – she appears to have some sodding genius level ability with computers. One Christmas she was in her room quiet for too long (always a bad sign!) and she had somehow hacked into my Dad’s iTunes account and downloaded £400’s worth of songs. Dad wasn’t happy but I was strangely proud]

Anyways

There are times that I have thrown myself a little ‘pity party’ when something hasn’t gone my way, fallen though or been let down/pissed off – am sure you have too

And thats ok, you’re allowed to 🙂

But when I see my sister, get a note from her like this or am reminded of her I realise I really need to shut the fuck up.

I have a functioning brain

I have a body that works (but is far too sodding hairy!)

I am allowed to live by myself – i don’t need a carer or to be kept safe because I don’t know a situation would harm me

I have my freedom

Anna won’t be able to have these to a large degree, and quite frankly I realise how lucky I am to simply be in a position to live and influence my life in any way I choose

Im 100% in control of my own destiny

Become a multi-squillionaire?

Down to me

End up with fuck all, homeless, alone

Whatever

Also down to me

Sometimes its worth thinking about how lucky YOU are to be fully in control of your mind, thoughts, business, body, relationships, friendships

Because one of the things that breaks my heart is that she will never be able to experience many of the things that I am fortunate enough to do

Even just being able to go to the shops and buy something is something that Anna can’t do safely

And yes, she is the reason I will continue to push my body and sanity to its limits to achieve a level of success as I want to make sure that she is safe when we are older

We are all – in our own way – lucky fucks

We are alive

We can make shit happen

And we can make a difference – IF we want to

No real point to this post – no rallying call to action, rousing ending or salient take away points

Nowt

(and yes she will get to see this as even though she doesn’t have a Facebook account, mum will show her this)

Just after opening this today what a lucky bastard I am and felt like sharing

End of

PS APPENDUM FOR COFFEE WITH DAN FUCKS – don’t need any sympathy or that shite, just wanted to share my musings as this hit me quite hard – in a good way especially after all the donations you guys have made to springboard/charity that helped her