Good Humor Gives You More Profits
Do you show your ‘lighter’ side on social? (And why you should have a bit more fun if you want more profits)
I just did this post on my wall
A happy little throwaway post with some gentle poking at the fitness ‘influencer’ world while taking the piss out of myself at the gym
I’ve always liked to have fun/lovingly troll those in my world
I learned this from my dad
Yes he was very good at his job
Yes he served his key accounts well
Yes he had a good product
He also would ‘take the piss’ in a gentle and very personal way
My musing is this
If I take the take to create/send you something that’s funny/makes you laugh/gives you a wee pokey pokey
Means I think about YOU as a person
What gets you going and what make you smile – aka – I’ve taken the time to get to know you and your world a bit better
I’m not talking about being a full on joker and fucking around – y’all have to deliver
But proper buy more when in good humour (a Dan Kennedy quote I believe) and why on earth would you want to work with a miserable fuck?
So don’t be afraid to show who you really are – warts and all – people but into YOU more and, as a result, often buy from you more
Dan ‘booty pop’ Meredithread more
A Story Of Reconnection In A Disconnected World – Part 4 of 4
I am pleased to finally share with you the final piece
When I started out writing this – I wanted to share with you the ‘breakthroughs’ I had from taking a trip down memory lane where back to where I lost it all
If you missed those?
This all started out with me feeling – as Teggles is want to say- ‘some type of way’
Business was good…
Health was good…
Life was good…
But I felt there was something missing and something that I felt I needed to reconnect with and get clarity on
And I promised you that this final piece would be the ‘pay off’ for you
But I hit a wall
This last piece has been one of the hardest pieces for me to write and as someone who is a prolific content creator?
I am not used to being ‘stumped’
Thats when I asked you what if you could wave the proverbial ‘magic wand’ what you would like to make you happy
(If you would like to see what people shared, this was the post imaginatively noted as post ‘#3.5’: https://www.facebook.com/groups/coffeewithdan/permalink/2465491273569191/ )
For those of you that took the time to reply?
I thank you
It gave me the inspiration to wrap this up in a way that – I feel – is befitting to the time you have taken to read this far
There is something about truly reconnecting with your past that is both incredibly grounding, and powerfully transformative IF you allow your subconscious to do its thing…
…and take the time to process the thoughts and feelings you have
As you read, I went down to pretty much nothing:
My confidence was shattered…
My ego had taken a savage beating…
I felt like I was totally ’invisible’ and had let everyone – including myself – down…
…At that point in my life I felt like a total failure
But that was some time ago and I have achieved so much since then its been insane
As you may of noticed with my writing, I do struggle to show off some of my successes as when others struggle, It can – if not written correctly come across as either vulgar or a bit of a ‘humblebrag’
– Im just not about that life –
But I think its important to be honest and open where I am now, especially seeing how far I fell and where Ive come from
The next bit might make some of you think ‘fuck you Dan’
And thats OK
I know when I was in the shit I looked at successful people and there were more than a few negative emotions
But if you think that?
Just remember where I once was and bear with – because it will all make sense as this comes to a close
As I write this, Im looking out to sea from my beachfront home, wearing a £13K watch, with a selection of fast-as-fuck, best-you-can-get toys to play with once this is written
I have been able to pay off my parents mortgage
I have more money than realistically I can spend
I have multiple businesses, a multi-country best selling book and clients all over the world
I don’t cook for myself
I don’t clean for myself
I am able to provide care and support for my family as/when needed
I have a team that handles all the things I’m not good at that
I have a job that makes a difference and that I love
I have more time than I know what to do with sometimes
This is not me just showing off, they are simply facts
I have achieved more than I thought I ever would:
– launched a business generating £330,000 in 48 hours
– partied at the Playboy mansion with Branson
– Wrote a book that has sold hundreds (yes hundreds) of thousands and changed countless lives
– co-headlined my own event with Gary V
– had the #1 book and podcast in multiple categories for TIME (not 1-day wonder ‘hacks’)
– dated models, actresses, porn stars and women realistically way out of my league (alright there were some bad choices in there too but you know #YLOL
– been all over the world and had all manner of adventures
– raced sports bikes at Silverstone
– run multiple businesses with often nothing more than a mobile phone
^^^ these are just the ones that come to the top of my mind
Think I’m a dick?
Well, thats your right (and I’ll be coming back to all of the above at the end – I think you’ll be surprised)
But just over 10 years ago I was hunting for food out of bins and being spat on while I contemplated ending my own life
Every single thing I have, own, or have achieved
It was down to me
Of COURSE I had help with teams and mentors and coaches and other epic humans that have been part of my journey
There have been no hand outs
There are not rich relatives
There has been no investment
Its been credit cards, hard work, trading time for ££££ and being prepared to make a sacrifice to achieve a life that I didn’t think I would have and WITH NO GUARANTEE IT WOULD WORK
Its hard to sacrifice for a future you that doesn’t exist, and with no idea when or sometimes IF it will work out
Back when I was totally in the shit?
The LAST thing I wanted to do was work – fuck I didnt even want to get out of bed!
Thinking and feeling that you are the biggest piece of shit failure ever is one of the most horrid experiences because its just you VS your own thoughts
Those thoughts make you want to curl up, hide from the world and often simply not exist
But I did and Im lucky to be here now to tell you the tale from, right now, a pretty good position
For me the ‘pull’ of my sisters future meant I couldn’t quit – I didn’t have a choice
Many of you have the same things with family and dependants or debts or health or whatever ‘reason’ you need to keep going
For me that was a big one
Yes there were a few ‘false starts’ but when I eventually got into my groove
But I got lost a good few years ago
The money and success got to my head; I started to chase fame and shiny things and £££ for the sake of it
It nearly broke me
Because I wasn’t happy
Everything I did was to fill the hole inside me that felt I wasn’t good enough, wasn’t lovable and was a failure
I worked harder and harder to make more and more and what did it get me?
An alcohol problem, a life that felt ‘hollow’ and it lost me the love of my life
I was completely disconnected and – this will sound insane – I hated who I was
I was helping all these people…
Doing valuable work (really)…
I had the things and the stuff and was able to give money away freely…
But I was at a loss as to who I was – I hated the ‘me’
I worked so fucking hard that where I thought being able to flash the cash around that I had never had would keep my (at the time) long term GF happy and make up for the fact that my folks and sister never saw me
I didn’t like who I had become but everyone else was so happy and I had the money I had always craved so I thought
‘Fuck it, who gives a fuck about me anyways’
So I kept working…
And I kept ignoring the feelings…
And I kept spending and partying and living the life that a ‘nobody’ like me should never ever have
You would of thought 2 little heart attacks would make me reconsider my lifestyle choices?
Na, I didn’t give a fuck
He could live or die as far as I cared
I didn’t even expect to make it that long, let alone be a success, so fuck it – Ive changed/saved lives, made a difference
If I go now?
Who gives a shit
But thats how it was
There were people in the ‘PLANET DAN’ world, my mentor, a few friends who stuck by me when it got tough
(When you make it – and Im sure in your own way you will – you will be AMAZED at the amount of people who you classed as friends turn their back on you, or try and stab you in yours)
It was hard for them
It was hard for me
But they stuck by me, gave me the help and support I needed, and I got through it
That was some years ago now, and Im happy to say such episodes (along with the alcohol) are a thing of the past
You might be thinking:
‘Whats this got to do with the previous story’
Well, I’m coming to that
The whole point was to how you the highs and lows of my journey
I started out with something
Then I lost it all
Then I made it all back 10-fold
Then I nearly lost it all again
Then I made it even bigger and better than before
The last few years have been stable and steady
No new book
No crazy new products
No massive tours
Slow, steady, consistent work
I had to prove to not only myself but those around me that they had ‘backed the right horse’
And I like to think I’ve done that
The last few years have been – give or take – all about reconnection
With who I am, what I stand for, and what I want to do with my life
And ya know what?
All the shit I listed above (the £££ and the things and the stuff and the selfies and the baller lifestyle)
Won’t make you happy
If you think it will?
I implore you to find out for yourself
In fact I truly hope everyone makes it at a crazy level just once because it will help you find out who you truly are
Because for most of my life?
I wasn’t happy
I had never felt worthy
I’d always felt like an outsider looking in
Wanna go one layer deeper?
I used to think if I was hit by a bus right there and then, bar my family – would anyone really care?
Felt like that for a long time and I thought the success and things and stuff would fill that void inside
And the more I tried to fill it with stuff?
The darker and deeper it got to the point where I nearly destroyed everything
Which brings me back to the trip to London, and this picture and what I’ll be sharing with you
When you get a level of success, life is easier
You don’t have to worry about bills
Shit you don’t like doing you pay other people to do
You have way more time on your hands than you ever expected to
All of which is fucking awesome
But if you chase money and fame and success ONLY, at some point in your life, you are going to come crashing down
I know so many wealthy people who did JUST this and they fucking hate themselves and their lives
I went to London because life HAS been relatively easy for a good few years now and I needed to reconnect with the struggle because THATS where my strength came from.
Going over the edge into the abyss and dragging myself out the other side shaped me into who I am today.
Its what I need to tap into once more to be able to best guide you through whatever shit life has thrown at you.
If you truly give a fuck, you need to be able to empathise with those at all levels.
And not be one of those ivory tower bell ends with an instaperfect feed and no grasp of what the real world is like.
…because everyone at every level has shit going on.
The Dan of today?
Very different to Dan back then.
I needed to put myself back in time to anchor myself with who the ‘new’ Dan is
What do I want from life?
Its pretty simple:
To bring people together
Help others achieve a better business and life
Connect people in a disconnected world
Have fun doing it on my own terms
Make a difference
I want to have enough money so my family can have a life they deserve, I can have some fun (and never hang up my own washing #fuckthat) and that I have plenty left to invest in making the world a better place
What I’ve learned is
ALL the toys
ALL the £££
ALL the sex
ALL the flash holidays
ALL the ‘fame and followers’
ALL the selfies with famous people
ALL the shit
WONT MEAN SHIT, if you aren’t happy – and however long I am left on this planet; I want to make as many people happy as I can
I’m not about to tell you to give up on big goals, sell all your possessions and live a life of monk.
Fun AND profits
Pleasure AND purpose
Achieving more than you ever dreamed of AND enjoying the journey along the way.
Creating opportunities to see, do, feel, experience everything you’ve ever wanted
That’s what I want for you.
Because those who strive to achieve more in life? You are my people.
Not people who are happy to settle for a life that’s “meh”. Always waiting for the weekend to roll round so they can take a couple days off from the life they hate.
And DEFINITELY not the Crispin’s and Tabitha’s of life who had every little thing handed to them on a plate and look down on normal people like a piece of filth on the bottom of their shoes.
People like you who know the struggle and have the heart and courage to take on what life throws at you.
Who go on through the ups and downs.
Playing the hand you’re dealt whatever that looks like.
And working harder than anyone else around them balancing business, relationships, family and more.
Because when you finally get there financially AND you’ve nailed the happiness thing?
The pay off is truly spectacular.
Ive realised my gift (for want of a better phrase) is not just bringing people together but helping them DO more, ACHIEVE more and BE more than they ever thought they could
And I’m fucking good at what I do
The vehicle that is entrepreneurship is one I have driven for many years and I know what Im doing
I want to help them to earn what they need to earn, do what they need to do and be who they need to be so they CAN be happy whether that be an extra £1000 a month of a 7-figure empire
That choice is down to you, how hard you want to play the game and what you are prepared to gamble to make it happen
It can happen
But to achieve that?
To a degree, you are going to have to struggle and you are going to have to sacrifice
Change (especially from a place of ‘im fucked’) isn’t easy
Its going to take time
Its going to take effort
I truly believe you CAN have it all, but if theres one thing Ive learned from all my highs and lows is that if you want something that you dont have?
You are going to have to work for it
There are sacrifices that need to be made
But heres the brilliant thing, its not forever
– it really isn’t –
If you TRULY give it your all you can massively change your life
People think it weeks and months whereas they should be thinking in YEARS
Is that sexy?
Is it fuck
But would you like to have an amazing life with an abundance of cash and opportunities and fun and adventure
Well, you can
But you’re going to have to work for it
And you are going to have to work when you don’t want to…
You are going to have to do things that you don’t want to do…
You are going to have to make sacrifices to get ahead…
And when the work is done, you will – in time – be amazed at what you can achieve
You are going to experience highs and lows and probably question yourself more than you think
You will – eventually – get all that you desire
But always remember why you are doing it, what you are doing it for and whats truly important to YOU
Which brings me to this picture
I love my family
But for a long time I was disconnected to them due to the fact I thought my only worth was work and to work
Hence Ive spent the last few years reconnecting on a deeper level with them because – quite frankly -they are fucking awesome
We have endured Dads’s cancer, Anna’s liver tumour/broken neck and all manner of life stuff
But we got through it
And I love them more than anything; the sacrifices I made allow me to help them and be there for them and spend time with
Yes there were some years in the wilderness, but Im back now
^^^ three things that I wasn’t for a long time
Connecting with who you are, what you stand for and what you belief in is something that is crucial to not only success in business but success in life
We all lose our way at times; we chase the shiny objects, the £££, the success – and we should
But we must remember who we are and what we stand for
Thats the ‘North Star’ to a fulfilling life
Its why I wanted to reconnect with that Dan because this is who I am
I give a fuck, I really do
Sure I have my off days; the ‘big sad’ comes to visit me from time to time and I do/say dumb shit
I am human
I fuck up
But I equally am – at 39 – the most sure of who I am, what I believe in, and what I want to achieve from my life
If you already know that?
Thats fucking fantastic
If you don’t?
I didn’t for a long time
But work on it; because when you find it it will change your life
Well, fuck knows lol
I promised the ‘big pay off’ and it ended up being a monster; it has been hard to write and Im sure some will think I’m a twat over posting this
Is what it is
But I feel its important to be as honest as we can with those of use that choose to invest their time, money or energy in us – especially when its so easy to ‘fake it’ online
Thats how I felt
That what I did
Thats what I am
And I wanted to thank you – however you came into my world – for being a part of it
I will continue to do what I can to serve you as best I can
I will fuck up at times – but we all do
Last week helped me remember why I do what I do on a deeper level, and I wanted to say thank you for placing your trust, time and efforts in me
Its appreciated more than you know
So thats it
My story from fuck all, something, nothing something and beyond
If nothing else I hope its showed you what can be done by an ordinary chap who decided he wanted more from life
If you have enjoyed reading this, or got value from it – its been a bastard to write but I hope its been useful
I’d be grateful to hear what you got from this, and I’m happy to answer any questions you might have
Thank you once again for reading
Means a lot
The Key To Get You Through Shitty Times
What do you do to ‘toughen up’?
This last weekend has been a tough one for many; it’s highlighted some of the issues that social media give us
I saw a post on my feed (scrolled to fast) where someone said that this will keep happening to a degree and that – as individuals – we also have to look after ourselves
A degree of mental toughness is extremely useful
I’m not – 100% NOT – saying that you should become hard or cold or anything
But working ON your resilience and mental toughness is key to help you get through shitty time’s
I’ve done a few trainings on this (my best ones from memory being in GRIT 1.0 and GRIT: The Evolution) but I’ll go live later this week to share some strategies that have worked for me and those I’ve taught
If you have any good ones to share, let’s hear them
Equally if you are struggling and feel comfortable to share here?
Let’s see if we can help you through itread more
Mindset Is Everything
What goes on in our heads impacts EVERYTHING
You can’t escape your own head.
Believe me, I’ve tried
The ONLY thing you can do is work with what you’ve got so that it fires you up instead of bringing you down and getting stuck in the cycle overwhelm, procrastination, limiting beliefs and self-sabotage.
First thing I’ve gotta say is no fucker is immune to this.
Not that motivational coach with the perfect life and a perma-smile
Being a human – it’s hard work.
Just because normal everyday existence of being a human isn’t punishment enough.
Some of us decide to become entrepreneurs
Crazy hours. Check.
Hard to connect with people not like us. Check
Opening ourselves up to massive critisism. Check
No guarentee of income. Check.
Daily battles with value and self-worth. Check
The list goes on.
No wonder most of us are tapped in the head.
Depression, ADHD, bipolar, suicidal feelings and more all effect a higher number of entrepreneurs than they do the general public.
That’s a fact.
If you’re going through things – know you are not alone.
Even at the lighter end of the scale
Stuff comes up.
We hold ourselfs back.
We worry about what other people are going to think
We self sabotage every time we get close to our goals
The greatest tool we have – our brains
Is the one thing that truly works against us to stop us progressing.
With that in mind – here’s a few of my top tips for taking control of your mindset
1 The power of the braindump
As I say, what is in our heads is what holds us back.
More often than not, we get so preoccupied with life and business that these thoughts start to fester away in the background without us giving all that much thought to them until they turn into massive monsters that blight up with procrastination, overwhelm, fear and more.
The first thing you need to do to tackle mindset issues is to get them out of your head and know what you’re actually dealing with
Regularly keep your head clear of all the junk and crap it picks up along the way.
You do this, with brain dum
Some benefits of doing regular brain dumps?
I’ve had some epic ideas because (for me) I actually am present with my own mind
That and the looped music helps ‘distract’ my brain and my subconscious can do its own thang
2. Problem solving
Similar to above – I’ve been able to come up with:
– copy hooks
– solutions to business and personal problems
– rationalise relationships (stick or twist)
It’s been very useful
3. Less rage/generally a bit nicer
I’m simple less angry
Don’t tend to go from 0-100 much
As a rule calm
– for anyone who has followed me for a while, this is novel eh –
4. Less stressed/sleep better
I go to bed kinda ‘empty headed’ now and as someone who’s mind NEVER SHUTS THE FUCK UP….sleep has been a bugger
Less so now
Here’s how it’s done…
1. Do a FULL brain dump BEFORE you switch off, get that shit out of your head and LEAVE IT
2. If you have a problem or something you need clarity on? Write it on a piece of paper to take with you – look at it at points
3. Either NO phone or on airplay mode
4. Have either a looped song, movie score or something like natural sounds (I like thunderstorms) on music
5. Take a book – paper one – with you that inspires you or is of interest; something you WANT to read as opposed to HAVE to read
6. Go buy a a pen and notepad, and a bottle of water (clarity dehydrated is nigh on impossible) and take em with you; any ideas that come up and
WRITE THEM DOWN
Not on your phone, go analogue
Then either a) go to a location where you don’t speak to anyone (coffee shop or train as example) or get yo ass into nature
Or be a massive tart like me and spa like fuck
2. Knowing when to go #ballsdeep & knowing when it’s time to pull back
As I say – entrepreneurs are a special bunch
We will give it all we’ve got and then some on top
And what happens is we will keep going and going and going until we break.
And when we start to break we keep pushing harder to punish ourselves and catch up.
It takes some time to learn to recognise the signs.
I have broken myself plenty of times in the past
I’ll see shifts in how I’m working, how I show up and the content that I put out.
Over time I go from full on content machine to full on sillyness and everywhere in between.
And by learning what makes Dan tick, I’ve come to see where I need to ease back, take a change of scene, mix some more fun stuff in my life if it’s gone a bit work heavy.
This is something I can’t give you an exact image of because it loooks a little different for each of us.
Here are a few signs to watch out for that give a hint it might be time to pull back and change things up before you burn out
– You content gets massively serious and dry OR you can’t do serious content and it’s all fun stuff
– You’ve stopped things like going to the gym and date nights because you’re constantly busy
– Your sleep pattern has shifted and you’re suddenly crashing early or waking up in the middle of the night
– You’ve been doing lots of videos, webinars and lives till now but you just can’t face hitting the button
– You’re suddenly eating everything…or nothing
As I say, how this shows up is individual.
If those come up, evaluate what you’ve got going on and how you can mix things up before you take yourself down.
And if you do go down – take a think back to how you were working and if any sign showed up so you can add them to your personal list of red flags
3 A taste of wealth
5-star luxury, first class service and a workin environment that primes you for success for under £10?!
I’m a huge fan of changing your environment to suit your needs
Let’s face it, working in your boxers on the sofa it’s sometimes hard to get your head into the right mindset
Now this was taught to me by the ever glorious Dexter Abraham – think about it like this
If you want to be productive – wouldn’t it make sense to work somewhere where people are cracking on with work?
If you want to be creative – wouldn’t it make sense to be in a space where you are inspired by what you see and hear?
If you want to be wealthy and successful – again wouldn’t it make sense to surround yourself around wealthy and successful people (and in an environment befitting?!)
I have worked in art galleries, come working spaces, looking out to sea you name it
But when I need to get my head into business mode?
I simply find a 5-star hotel (and I find dressing smarter helps me get my head in gear too) and set up shop in the hotel bar or lobby
All you need to do is buy a coffee and you get snacks, peace and quiet, wifi and your are around business folk who – like you – are getting business shit done
What it does is it gives you a taster of luxury that you don’t normally experience in your day to day life.
Your barometer for what is possible is set currently wherever it’s at.
Your surroundings, upbringing and life experiences will all have an impact.
By elevating your surroundings with little simple luxuries, you start to tweak that barometer bit by bit.
You start seeing the kind of life that could actually be possible.
And as a little bonus – you could make some connections whilst you’re there that can open serious doors.
4 Just say “Fuck it!”
Now you know I love fight club right? That book and film were responsible for some of the biggest mindset shifts (yes I hate myself for writing that!) I have had as a man
One of my fave scenes?
The one with the shop clerk – where he took his licence, held a gun to his head, and told him if he don’t actually make the changes and did the one thing he wanted to do with his life?
He would come back and
no more life to live
So back to the exercise; if you had to change, and you had 30 days to do it, and my ass is physically coming for you at he end of the 30 days
What would you actually change?
Come on – show some fucking balls/ovaries: what are you unhappy with in your life RIGHT NOW
what are you going to do to change it?
Or, are you going to be one of those people that pussyfoot brought life blame everyone else for their problems instead of taking ownership and fixing shit
So much of what we are taught from school onwards is about what we CAN’T do
And it’s taken me a long time to ditch that mode of thinking and simply saying ‘fuck it’ and doing more stuff I want to do, with the people I want to do it with, when I want to do it with…
For those of you that know my story or how this group started
It was never – ever – supposed to be a thing
But now it is
It’s a ‘thing’ that helps 1000’s of pekoe every day and that’s fucking awesome – but that’s a result of me saying ‘fuck it’
Going after what you want in life when you have been conditioned by education, society, peers – whatever – IS hard
Maybe I’m not so smart because I just do stuff; I don’t let my brain talk me out of shit
Sure, I **could** think more, but every time I thought too much?
I never ended up doing the thing and regretted it as a result
Yes of course my ‘act first, ask questions later’ attitude had caused problems time to time
But more often then not?
When I just DO, things get good
Case in point, the when we recently opened ‘Espresso With Dan’
There has been a good few handfuls of people who have reached out the very same week they joined wishing they had done this not months, but YEARS ago
Think how much further they would be ahead if they had just gone for it?
We all rationalise things in our own head
Thinking about the what ifs
Whereas most of us?
Should – more often than not – go #ballsdeep into the ‘fuck it’ zone, ESPECIALLY if they have been stagnant for a period of time
Anyways I wanted to share this, because I took control of my life at 33 – 5 years ago – and only if I’m being TRULY honest with you have I lived it 100% on MY terms – MY rules – MY life for the last 18 months or so
When you stop giving a fuck about what people think and start doing what YOU want to support YOUR life
You will be amazed how fucking brilliant most days are
5 Use the negative to create positive
Negatives have and will come up for you.
They are going to come up again and again.
There’s not a fat lot you can do about them occurring.
How you handle them and what you do next IS under your control
Now you are going to be in one of 2 places right now.
You need a serious kick up your arse to make you shit or get off the pot
This world ISNT for everyone
You want to make it?
You fed up of excuses?
You sick of being poor as piss?!
Sometimes it’s time to say ENOUGH and go all out
G = a fiery hour of teaching you to get some balls/ovaries. This will be ferocious. Because it fucking should be – I expect 20-50% of you that join NOT to come back as I will not hold back – and some folks can’t take that
R = resistance &resilience – how to overcome one and develop the other. I will show you how to understand the shite you tell yourself is killing your progress, and how to develop mental ‘toughness’
I = influencee; attain it, from it, use it – leverage it. You got skills or talent? If no one knows that means fuck all. I’ll walk you through how I do what I do
T = tenacity; a practical ‘how to’ day to day to man/lady the fuck up, keep going and actually make something of your life. This is the nuts and bolts – what you do every day to make it beats any fancy tactic or funnel – I’ll fucking win as I won’t quit. You need to be like this
4 Hours of brutality using the full power of “pre-zen Dan”
When this series was created, it was recorded live over the space of a week.
And in that one week – lives were changed.
People finally stepped up and started doing the things they knew they needed to do.
They stuck a finger up to their limiting beliefs and did the work that had terrified them.
They dropped the poisonous snakes in their life that were draining every ounce of life out of them.
They sent those emails. Made those calls. Had those conversations.
And when they did?
They got results.
Opened doors to huge opportunities
Had their biggest month in business…ever!
And wondered why the hell they’d been holding back so long.
If this is speaking to where you’re at right now and you are DONE with repeating the same shitty cycles day after day.
Click the link below and go pick up your copy of GRIT
Scenario #2 – When you’re good you’re great but it only takes one thing to knock you right the way back.
In that case, you don’t require quite such a brutal ass kicking
What you need is a toolbox of strategies you can pull out at a moments notice when when some of the darker thoughts and emotions appear
Will all raise their heads sooner or later
Something will happen in your life.
A run of bad luck
A relationship breakdown
Losing a major client
Seeing the epic lives other people are living through the window of social media wondering why you can’t have that.
And if you don’t have the tools to turn that negative on its head – it can consume you
Taking all the fight out of you bit by bit.
That’s why, a few weeks back after running the free rage to riches challenge (which for a free challenge created some ridiculous results for people)
I decided it was time to go balls deep into harnessing the darkness and launched GRIT:Red
Taking on each of those negative feelings one by one – I dove DEEP into why they come up and provided simple actionable strategies for dealing with them when they do.
Those who’ve been through the training have left with a toolbox they can dive into whenever they need it – whatever life throws at them.
Now it’s your turn, if your so inclined
To get hold of that toolbox yourself, all you need to do is click this link https://coffeewithdan.com/rededitionread more
What’s Like To Be Told What To Do
Do you like being told what to do?
I was once a doorman/bar manager at a ‘gentlemens erotic dance boutique’
– aka a strip club –
When I lived up north
At the same time, I was a sales director for a pretty big headhunting firm and in charge (from memory) of a few mill turnover wise on my business unit
I had a base of 70k and took home I think around 120/130 if I remember correctly
Yet Friday and Saturday nights?
I would don the black attire…
Spike up the hair…
(Check out pic in comment #1 🤣🤣)
And do as I was told
Wierdly after a week of meetings, checking KPI’s, spreadsheets and telling others what to do…
…I found it quite refreshing too
All I had to focus on was greeting customers, keeping the ladies in check (I ended up doing this via a packet of liquorice allsorts when they chase out #truestory) and keeping the bar stocked up
That was it
Now I didn’t need the money (it was done in part firstly to stop me drinking and weirdly when I was a PT my entire client base was strippers – I had 14 of em!) but it was a nice ‘break’ from being in charge
What am I going on about?
Let me explain
If you could remotely ‘model’ my approach in any way I think it’s vaguely classed as servant leadership
Liberated from the internet, this seemed to sum it up nicely;
‘In 1998, writer and philosopher Larry Spears distilled Greenleaf’s ideas into ten key servant leadership traits: listening, empathy, stewardship, foresight, persuasion, conceptualization, awareness, healing, commitment to the growth and development of people, and building community’
Kinda an accurate description I would say
Mixture of all 4
But I remember what it’s like to be TOLD what to do
Recently, as well as talking more ‘strategically’ with my clients, I’ve found great success by simply telling them what to do
Now you can’t do that without a base of experience and success (IMO) in your niche/vertical behind you
But when your mind is rammed with life and business and clients and family and hobbies and god knows what else is going on (likely at 100mph)
I find it serves people well to be told do this, then that, by that date
Never try make it more than 3-5 times max; ideally one BIG goal to achieve between check ins and some sub goals that – time permitting – we can knock off too
Yes as entrepreneurs we crave freedom
TOO much freedom can leave you overwhelmed, unsure and expending your energy in a variety of areas that – in all honesty – would of saved you a fuck tonne of time/effort/energy/££ if you would if just sought out expert help to guide you at the start
So if you have been ‘flying solo’ for a while and let’s say in the last 6 months or so haven’t progressed?
Maybe invest in someone who has ‘trod the boards look before you who can tell what needs to be done…
…instead of asking YOU what needs to be done
Just my musings while enjoying an Epsom’s salt bath; be good to hear your take on it as well…read more
Everyday Gets A Little Easier
This is the part that many simply don’t share
Every day – especially when you start out – is hard
It is hard for a while, longer than than you think, and utterly not straight forward
Pretty much every ‘blueprint’ or ‘business plan’ is a best guess – hopefully according to previous experiences
You have to do the work
You have to adapt it for you
You have to stay the course
The amount of time things take to achieve people massively underestimate
It’s quite fun having been around a bit
I remember seeing a post from someone who was a fitpro maybe a few years back with their ‘million dollar blueprint’ they were touting
They have not made a million dollars lol
Because if my hearings issues as a kid, I developed a RIDIK visual memory
I remember the things and stuff
What people day they achieve is often grossly over estimated
What I have now is (if you want to look at another way) slow and boring and at times tedious
Improved over time
Of course life and business gets easier if you improve over time
But it takes time
Hence maybe be wary of those who are relatively new on the scene of that aren’t open with their past
They may be good
But more often then not many of their claims are a little bit ‘glossy’ and their background a little bit wallpapered over
Look for those who have shown a steady degree of progression – it’s amazing what people say that do but can’t (or that they are shady humans masquerading as ‘doing good’ now…)
Yes you can achieve many, many of the things you want
Just understand that it’s gonna take a bit of time and effort
It does get easier
Ya just have to do the workread more
Why Money Solves Most Problems
Fight to earn what you need to support the ones you love (and get angry if you’re not)
Today was challenging
Peeps in EWD know as planned to do a live so told em; the goat (my Dad) was back into hospital last few days and shits not fab
But the charming old devil was getting the nurses on side when I saw him so he could get extra treats
– I am my fathers son lol –
We don’t have an extended family
It’s me, mum, goat and my sister spud
My family have always been there for me when I haven’t been well, and I’m proud I’m in a position to be able to help them when they need me
They haven’t asked
I’m just handling shit
Which is why I truly urge all of you to work as hard as you fucking can NOW so IF you need it?
You can be there for the ones you love
My mentor Dex said to me not so long ago
‘Money solves most problems’
And it does TBH
It gives you freedom to help those who need it and help yourself as I’m able to next week when shit needs to be DONE
Which is why I always advise focus on looking after your first
Get your own house in order – get paid – THEN look to help others
You simply can’t pour from an empty cup…
And if you’re not in that position?
You need to harness something deep inside to make you do the work that – let’s be honest – you probably don’t want to do
I’m able to help my family NOW because of the YEARS of 5am starts and 1am finishes, 6 days a week, that built the foundation of what I have now
It was exhausting but I just powered the Fuck through
I got pissed off and used that negative energy for good:
I was angry my folks had to work into their 60’s so hard
I was angry at the fact we (as a family) get fuck all help for my sister what other lazy fucks get hand put out after hand out
I was angry that I couldn’t give my family what they needed when they had given me all I got
I channeled that anger into energy and and I worked my ass off
You get balance AFTER the hard yards have been walked
Sure you can have it at now if you want
But you probably won’t achieve all you want to achieve if you do
There needs to be an element of sacrifice if you want to achieve more
– only you can decide at what level you want to play –
But if your maybe a month or two away from being fucked…
If you aren’t where you need to be…
And if people rely on you?
Get to work
It will suck ass now, but future you will be be grateful AF
**post posting edit**
PS Realised this could come across as one of those chest beating look at me raaaa alpha bullshit kinda posts
If it does – soz
I’m angry that my fam have to keep getting kicked in the teeth but I’m proud I can step up when they need
I don’t often think when I write I just share what’s in my head or heart
Hope someone got some value from this – appreciate you reading if you did
PPS in the scope of honesty I vaguely look like I have a bicep here so yeah I’m getting mileage out of it #polishedturdread more
Why I’m Doing What I’m Doing
[So you know why I’m doing what I’m doing and asking what I’m asking]
Recently you will of seen me ask a few Q’s such as:
– what level of biz are you at
– what goals do you have outside of work
Being the last few (and I have a few more to come)
I believe in adding value
– I hope you know this –
But equally as a leader I believe it is my job to LEAD
You won’t find me asking insipid questions over and over again
Ya know why this is done?
1 – engagement, people love talking about themselves
2 – to feign interest thus building up a picture of your issues/weaknesses/obstacles to make closing you easier as you have told them what cracks to insert the knife and twist
For me I try use it to get a ‘lay of the land’ and my ego isn’t so fucking massive that I think I know it all
Think of it as a ‘pulse check’
And then subsequent content is in alignment with a) my values and b) the greater good of the group
I will personally DM everyone who took time to comment on the pinned post with the content and a few suggestions depending on where they are at
Will I suggest some work with me?
But I’m fucking open about it
I’ll equally suggest some folks invest in trusted partners
And yes I’ll be telling people who and what to steer away from as well
If you lead a group you have a DUTY to lead with courage and conviction and morals
If y’all JUST doing it to make £££
You don’t have a community as far as I’m concerned
You have a farm
How I see it like this
This is like a digital sea
Time to time I fish
If my bait is right, and I have picked the right spot
I’ll catch some fish
I see a fair few with groups – meh – it’s like they have a captive fish farm
There’s no effort because the fish can’t go anywhere due to the manipulation techniques used and because they have been fed the same (shitty) food every day they actually think it’s good for them
Hence when the food (bait) comes in from a fisherman
They just bite – no matter if it’s good or not
I’m not a greedy fuck; I do well and I enjoy what I do – no desperation from me
So when you see me asking Q’s and figuring shit out?
It’s so I can do my job and serve the masses not so I can prey on your weaknesses
For those that want to be caught – if my bait is good and nourishing – they will bite
May not be the smartest From a making all the £££ point of but fuck it
Sits right with me
So yeah if I think I can help – and I’m the right person to do it – I’ll say
If I’m not, I’ll recommend
But know this
What you a) have seen me ask and b) will see me ask is to benefit the group overall
I’d rather create LESS content that’s fucking gold and actionable than shitty post after shitty post- with a giggle and a competition and a challenge from time to time
Your time is valuable and if ask yourself to engage it’s for you as well as me
Just to show you a little of what’s going on behind the eyes and why I’m doing what I’m doing
Any Q’s ask away, feedback welcomes as well as suggestions
Hope y’all having a good day
One Day It Will Happen
Are you working on your weak points (or even worse kidding yaself that your working at all)
Is gonna be a bastard; I’ve got a pretty cool goal for my 40th in June and I need to be a) lighter, b) more flexible and c) with able to withstand rapidly changing g-forces/impact
– it’s gonna be legit fam –
It’s VERY easy to focus on the areas we are good at – I could it cracked on with my nutrition and lifted heavy assed weights (I’m relatively strong)
That’s all the shit I’m good at
This week – and the next 94 days are all about the weak points I have in not just my body, but my mindset, relationships, businesses, happiness
6 hours of my day, every day, is all about weakness in ALL the areas above
I’ve read the books
Had the calls
Consulted the experts
Thing is MOST people do exactly that – just what I’ve outlined
But they do DO THE WORK that needs to be done after knowing WHAT to do
– it’s not fun
– fairly boring most of the time
– painful (physically and mentally depending)
But the thing where most fuck up is the fact they want it NOW
Wanna feel good now?
Have a wank
Now do the fucking work 😘
Twattery aside the stuff I’m doing now is really just not what I wanna be doing as I get no pay off NOW
I want the £££ NOW
I want the body NOW
I want the freedom NOW
I want the happiness NOW
I want the relationship NOW
– we all want it now –
And I’ll have all the above, I have a fair bit already – but there’s bits I don’t have
And for those bits I have to do the work
And the work that gets me those bits isn’t fun but it IS crucial
Everyone wants the end result no on sees the fuckery it took to get there
So if you aren’t there yet
KEEP FUCKING GOING
Because – and I can’t say when because there’s no way of knowing – but it kinda just ‘happens’ one day
And that ‘happening’ (surprise surprise) is after a sustained period of work for time
Keep it up y’allread more
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