Take The Rough With The Smooth
Oncewhen I was speaking with Justin Devonshire,who on a call with a client of his, discussed the harsh reality of what we do as entrepreneurs.
We have some very experienced people here the Coffee with DanFacebook group and equally some very new and ‘green’ folks to this world.
It is NOT for everyone.
You see all the books, the courses, the digital ‘high fives’ from those who are making it work.
But we hear less from those who it isn’t.
It’s all too easy to look at people who are already making it, and even though you hear their back-stories, the struggles they have gone through to get where they are now.
When you have no money to pay the bills, you spend every second of your day wonderingwhere the next paycheckwill come from, paralysed by fear and you feel like giving up?
Where do you turn?
Do you know what it actually takes to achieve what you are looking to achieve?
Do you have the support, the drive, the ability to willingly sacrifice time, effort, energy?
Saw an article the other day about suicide rates in entrepreneurs.
It’s such a brutally lonely and tough journey at times and the higher up you get…
The lonelier it is.
I can’t stand when I see people slagging off those who give people shit who have jobs.
I miss having a job at times.
There is a lot to be said to being around people, routine, working towards one goal, being able to switch off when you get home.
When you decide to put your hand up and say ‘I’m going to do it my way’ no one prepares you for what it’s going to be like.
And-which is more insane-you end up spending so much time in your head that you create scenarios and ‘stuff’ that half the time never happens.
Not too sure what my thoughts were behind this tip, or why I wrote it to be honest -just felt like sharing.
There’s nothing wrong with choosing to ‘settle’or going ‘all in’.
Just like in anything in life,for all the smooth, you have the rough to deal with too.
Now,there are times that ALL of us feel like the weight of the world is crushing us down to the point where no matter what you do, there is no way out, no end, no hope.
It sucks foetid donkey dick!
Andwhen you are in that ‘place’,you can sometimes feel that it’snever going to end.
Let me give you a tip.
Problems are just that.
We have been gifted with an amazing mind that can overcome all manner of obstacles, but it’salso a bastard as it spins thoughts into scenarios and situations that often don’t happen -but when you are in them,you can be paralysed by fear.
So, my advice to you -if you EVER feel like it -DON’T feel that you have to suffer.
You are your own boss, it’syour life -if you NEED to get away, fucking get away!
I would advise letting only those who might really need you have your mobile number.
Delete ALL your social apps (you can always reinstall them later).
Be a selfish prick -if you want to stay in bed all day until 6pm watching science fiction films and ignore the world (as I did).
You have every right to.
Equally, having someone ‘in your corner’ is very useful. I have LONG said that us entrepreneurial folks suffer in the old noggin quite a bit, I am fortunate to have two ‘go to’ people namely Edi Tsang and Mark Whitehand.
And if anyone tells you that you are weak, a pussy, ‘mental’ or weird…
Tell them to go fuck themselves.
Like no lube, no spit.
You simply don’t need those people in your world.
So I havesimple little check list that makes this a little more ‘spit heavy’:
. make friends with people-not hard, connect, have genuine conversations, get to knowone another
. give before you ask…read more
Want someone to do something for you..?
Well do something for them first…
DON’T expect them to repay the favour, but offering to help, give your time, introduce them to someone, or ‘hook them up’ always is a good place to start…
. value THEIR time and expertise
if they are really good at something, it will haveprobably cost them a fair bit of time and money to get there…
think about what you are going to say before you say it-alittle bit of tact goes a long way…
. pay them…
If I have invested in someone, I feel a lot more comfortable asking for some help.
The people in my platinum group, my private clients, Espresso with Danpeeps and anyone who has paid for my time get FIRST priority…
Why? Because it’sthe right thing to do.
So next time you are looking for a cheeky leg up, an intro, or something that’sjust out of your grasp?
A little bit of saliva goes a long way….
Stop Giving A Shit About What People Think
Stop giving a shit about what people think!
I used to care SO much what people thought.
What did it do for me?
I do my own thing.
Dance to my own beat.
Couldn’t give a tuppenny fuck what people think anymore and as a result?
Life is good.
Now be honest with yourself -how much of what you do is because of other people?
How much do you care about what people say about you?
Do you embrace your unique talents, quirks and downright weird side?
Why the fuck not?
Life is so bastard short.
Why do you care so much about what other people think when they in all likelihood are too wrapped up in their own shit!
Peace out.read more
Network On Social Media…Without Being A Douchebag
Here’s the right way and the wrong way to ‘network’ online (social media) -an overview and practical tips you apply immediately.
Today, I had an awesome conversation with someone who had recently discoveredme, and I had noticed that they had liked a fair chunk of my posts.
So I sent them a message and said ‘hello’.
Not trying to sell anything.
I *JUST* genuinely wanting to connect with another human, who is in the same world as me.
That in turn leads to a call and now we will hang out and work together, allfrom having a genuine interest in getting to know the people who like my work.
Now,I’ve said this before -and this is the wrong way to network, or grow your online influence:
. add person as friend
. send ONE message (some don’teven send that) with a vague and cut/paste‘hello’
. pitch your fucking coaching programme
…mainly, because you look like a towering cockwomble.
Honestly, I know I can be accusedof dumbing it down at times, but copy this = real connections and longer-termrelationships.
See someone you want to connect with?
. add them as a friend
. wait for them to accept
. when they have accepted -shoot them a PERSONAL message -have a read of their wall, what they like, and reference WHY you added them
. have NO agenda
. be a fucking human!
Equally, if that is a little too direct for you, try this:
. follow those people you wish to connect with
. leave meaningful comments on their post, fairly regularly -but not SO often that you look like a stalker
. share their content, take them, reference WHY you shared it -again not often, ONLY if you actually rate what they have written
. interact with on public message comments
. add as friend
. be a fucking human!read more
Honestly, does that sound that hard?
My friend Justin Devonshire taught me an amazing phrase that ‘Your Net Worth Is Your Network’.
Do I have an amazing network?
I would say so.
Do I class these people as a means to an end, a $ sign, or someone I can get something from?
Do I fuck!
If that happens -great!
If not, don’t give a shit -the fact I have a meaningful connection means more to me than some short-termgain.
That and I actually like people!
So,next time you add someone on FB -have some manners if they accept and at least shoot them a little message.
Trust me -this goes a long way.:-)
12 Weeks To Get Something Off The Ground
I have lost count of the amount of times I have spoken to some truly talented people,who have this ‘great idea’ that they have been working on for months, if not years.
Yet I have never seen it:
- could be a book
- could be a digital product
- could be a physical business
But it stays in the planning stages for, well, ever.
These are the people that are going to look back one day and think…
Why didn’t I just do it?
So far,on my travels and having met all the clever and successful peeps I have,none of the buggers really had a clue that they would be doing what they were doing now.
They took an idea, did some research, then went in…
I have in the last year set up a total of 8 business ventures, and 4 of them (gym/studio, iamthefitnesscopywriter.com, Coffee with Danand my coaching business) have been a success.
The other 4?
Went nipples north.
The thing is I used to be attached to failure -when things went wrong I thought I was a screw up.
I have a simple system.
I give myself 12 weeks / 90 days to do the following:
- make a profit
- step back
If after 90 days I’m doing too many hours, it’snot profitable and quite frankly if it’s annoying me?
I tank it.
Shut up shop.
There is no emotional attachment to it -I mean you can’t hit a home run every time right?
12 weeks, 3 months, 90 days -from start to finish.
Easy and peasy.read more
Just Say No
One of the BEST pieces of advice I can give you is:
95% of opportunities say ‘NO’ to
With a caveat…
I had been 100% guilty of saying ‘YES’to everything and when you start out it’s mega-tempting to say yes to everything -especially when the coffers are empty:
- do you want to JV on this
- let’s launch this new product
- how about we pitch X to Y
- podcast, should definitely be doing more podcasts
- and so on
There comes a point where there is only so much of you to go around -and you can become something I learned about in my headhunting days -a ‘busy fool’. (more…)read more
Remember Where You Came From
Sometimes,I get a bolt out of the blue that reminds me of the humble beginnings of my entrepreneurial journey…
What am I talking about?
Well how does the idea of turning sideways and Indiana Jones style inching along the wall to get INTO the shower cubicle sound like?
Or having 8 mini heaters in the winter, wearing jumpers and tracksuit bottoms to bed?
How about sharing your living space with every shape,size and speed of spider known to man?
How about banging your head EVERY FUCKING NIGHT when you go to bed?
Or pooling your cash together to figure out of you had enough to get food the next day, and rushing into Morrison’s just before closing when you realised you had enough to buy yourself a treat for a quid from the reduced section?
Sound fun? (more…)read more
How To Be Happy In Life – A ‘Danifesto’
This is a recent ‘philosophy’ that I have been trying to live my life by, and its rather simple to be honest – and as a result my happiness as gone up many times over.
But since going online there is this insidious ‘underbelly’ that is really starting to get on my tits – and there are some sneaky little shits that out there.
You see with my philosophy? Its VERY simple: (more…)read more
The Birth Of #BeMoreDan
^^^ I’ve decided to make this a thing -care to join me?
Firstly, I have not let anything get to my head.
A few folks used this in a thread -namely what would they do is they were me or had me there telling them what to do
Apparently, saying ‘fuck it’ and just doing it anyways is the short and simple summation.
How would I define myself then?
Well, definitely a work in progress but the more ‘DAN’ I am -they better my life gets! (more…)read more
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